The Chuck Norris Total Gym Realy Works - there are literally people who sit up until 5am with nothing better to do than eat chips and get fat who have them tucked neatly in corners of their houses.


YES!

The Chuck Norris Total Gym - I'm 41 and completely up my own arse on physical appearance. I can't read well and have a very limited range of conversational topics. But WOW! I look good - don't I? Well, don't I, huh?
I worked out on weights and steroids for 23 years, but thanks to a financial inducement from The Chuck Norris Total Gym, 2 weeks ago, I feel great! Well worth my dick being tucked up into my backside.


PARP!

I used to feel uncomfortable in public because my natural body gases tend to sneak up on me. I could never get a date because of my self-firing butt bugle.
But now, thanks to the NEW Chuck Norris Total Gym, I simply stroll into the park, spot a good-looking chick and roundhouse kick her to the ground. Its as easy and satisfying as that. And at just $3.99 a month, yes, its true - a mere $399.99 a month, its worth having to sell the car.


Editorial Note:

I'd like to sincerely thank Total Gym for their work out video. I've only had it for three weeks, but thanks to Christie Brinkley and the pause button, I've already got a right arm like Arnold Schwarzenegger's.